Maybe Pigs Can Fly After All
It might seem impossible, but it can happen; here are some examples
You know what they say about things that will never happen — “When pigs fly!” The image alone cements the idea. If we said “When dogs fly,” it might not seem so far-fetched — one can easily imagine a little chihuahua sailing aloft in a high wind. Even fish can fly. But pigs? Not so much.
Technically, “When pigs fly” is an adynaton, a figure of speech in the form of hyperbole taken to such extreme lengths that it’s an impossibility. It’s thought to have originated from the Scottish centuries ago (the Scots invented almost everything, after all), and now the phrase is as common as a one-dollar bill.
Here are a couple of examples of common usage.
One of John Steinbeck’s professors told him he would never be an author; when he eventually did, Steinbeck started to print every book he wrote with the insignia "Ad astra per alas porci" (to the stars on the wings of a pig). He sometimes added an image of a flying pig, called "Pigasus.”
Lewis Carroll gave a nod to the pig in “Alice’s Adventures In Wonderland.”
"Thinking again?" the Duchess asked, with another dig of her sharp little chin.
"I've a right to think," said Alice sharply, for she was beginning to feel a little worried.
"Just about as much right," said the Duchess, "as pigs have to fly ..."
In fact, if you look closely at the Pig Baby that Alice held at the Duchess’s house, you might be able to spot some wings sprouting, because Alice did end up thinking her way out of several dilemmas in Wonderland. And Steinbeck, of course, famously won the Nobel Prize for Literature in 1962. There’s little doubt that the pigs in these examples flew very high indeed.
So, maybe pigs can fly after all. At least sometimes. Here are seven examples of soaring swine as we scan the newsfeeds this week.
Ukraine Beating Back the Russians. No one thought it possible. When the tanks rolled across the Ukrainian border more than 30 days ago, conventional wisdom was that Kyiv would fall within days, followed by a puppet regime propped up to do Putin’s bidding. It turns out everyone was wrong. President Zelensky donned his t-shirt, grandmothers started making Molotov cocktails and everyone started singing the national anthem. Now Russia’s actually at the negotiating table.
Lynching is Declared a Federal Crime. It only took 100 years. The first attempt to outlaw lynching under federal law was made in 1900. It failed. Repeated attempts during the Jim Crow era also failed. In fact, more than 200 attempts failed over the years. Pigs flew this week when President Biden signed it into law.
Business Lobbies for Taxes. You read that correctly. The U.S. Chamber of Commerce is opposing holidays for gasoline taxes, the favored strategy by state governments to take the sting out of inflation. The Chamber is worried that suspending taxes, which primarily pay for improvements to roads and highways, will jeopardize progress of the $1 trillion bipartisan infrastructure bill. Even the business community sometimes recognizes that taxes make a lot of sense (just maybe not too much of them).
Business Travel Is Returning. Covid creamed business travel. We became a nation of pajama-clad Zoomers. A bellwether is travel and expense-management company Campbell Travel, which said that business travel in its portfolio is up from 51 percent in January to 67 percent in March, much of it driven by small and medium-sized companies. Fasten your seatbelts and grab the Biscotti!
A Democratic Administration Stands Up For Fossil Fuel. That’s right. President Biden got his hands dirty last week when he stood arm-in-arm with the European Union and called for a massive increase of natural gas exports to the EU in order to counter Russia’s energy monopoly. It only took an invasion of Ukraine, but eventually that pig flew.
Omega Swims Downstream. Every serious watch company in the world right now is trying to swim upstream. The Swiss watch industry had its best year ever in 2021, logging worldwide sales of $22.3 billion CHF ($24.2 billion USD). Watch companies are doing their best to exploit the trend with ever-pricier models boasting more features, unique complications, more gold, silver and platinum, and a lot more planned scarcity. Omega strapped a pair of wings on to a pig and bucked the trend last week, releasing a collaboration with Swatch of its iconic Moonwatch, which sells for roughly $7,000 today. The new version, the MoonSwatch, is quartz-powered in a ceramic/plastic case and is priced at less than $300. Even a flying pig could afford this model!
Will Smith Finally Apologized to Chris Rock. It took a couple of days, but once the adrenaline and tequila wore off, King Will swallowed his pride, strapped on a pair of wings and apologized. "I would like to publicly apologize to you, Chris. I was out of line and I was wrong." Did somebody just see a pig fly by?
All of these examples bring to mind another adage, which is probably the truest of all.
“Anything can happen, and probably will.”
Peace out.
This article is just exactly perfect. Loved it.